Three Empty Words – Episode 1

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I turned around for the millionth time trying to get some sleep, I wondered how Xeno was able to sleep with such a critical issue at hand. When all hope was lost, I grabbed my gown and wore my house slippers then walked to the dining room. I had an assignment that was due in two days and so I would use this time to work on it.

I must have been so engrossed in my work that I didn’t even notice mum standing before me with a cup of hot chocolate.

‘Hey mum.’ I said knowing fully well that she was not pleased with me being up at that hour

‘Xenia you know you need to get some sleep.’ She said almost pleading

I didn’t like it when she sounded like that, she was the nicest person that I knew and also the toughest. Raising two girls on her own and starting her own interior designing company wasn’t easy.

I decided to study journalism whilst my sister who was always trying to impress mum went for designing which of course she was amazing at. Whatever Xeno touched turned into gold, she was blessed with the beauty and brains, whilst I on the other hand despite being her identical was born with a heart defect. Doctors said I wouldn’t live till ten because my cells were incapable of pumping blood to my heart but I guess I am my mother’s miracle.

Xeno never so much loved me because she claimed I took ma’s love from her without understanding that I needed the constant attention; she called me a walking corpse and well I never blamed her.

Home schooled my whole life, college was the only time I went out there and the first year was tough for me. Still is but I am managing. My sister well, is excellent at all she does and the envy of every girl out there but her attitude; well not so admirable.

‘Ma you know I need to finish this assignment.’ I said fidgeting with the buttons on my laptop.

She sighed heavily.

‘Xenia I know you like the back of my hand, what is keeping you up this hour?’ she asked pointing at the clock

I turned to look at it; it was three in the morning.

‘I was really hoping that Xeno and I would become closer after dad coming into the picture. I didn’t realize that it would mean us being more apart.’ I said honestly rubbing my eyes

She came to where I sat and embraced me, I don’t know what I would do without her but truth be told she was my pillar and my strength.

‘You will be just fine, remember he has settled in the country and Lusaka is not very far from here.’ She said

I smiled weakly

Mum had built in Chisamba and we had moved since, this is the place we knew.

The place we called home and I loved the quiet.

‘Aren’t you excited about having your father here? About him getting to know you?’ she asked rubbing my back

I smiled

I honestly thought I would be but after learning that he was married and had two kids who had remained back in the states, I wasn’t so excited. I don’t know, maybe I just hoped that my parents would get together and be the normal happy family that everyone is supposed to be.

‘Finish your chocolate and get some rest.’ She said getting up ‘Sure mum.’ I responded

I buried myself in the work and an hour later I was back in bed, this time around I managed to sleep and was only awakened by the tractor outside which was obviously being driven by one of the workers.

I yawned before checking my phone, I had access to everything but I wasn’t so much of a social media person and so I just watched while everyone posted their photos and I just scrolled down my wall.

I made my bed and went into the bathroom to take my bath, I looked into the mirror and smiled a little. I was beautiful but I didn’t have the courage or confidence that most twenty year olds had. I wore clothes twice bigger my size and for makeup, well you can say I was plain Jane.

‘We woke up.’ I said to the image in the mirror

This was the same thing I told myself every day because nobody knew when I would kick the bucket.

I took my bath then went to my room, after applying some lotion I settled for boyfriend jeans with a very big sweater and wore no makeup. I tied my hair in a bun which I had never treated but just applied heat once in a blue moon to dry it. ‘Good morning.’ Mum said

‘Good morning.’ I said with a smile

She was in a royal blue knee high dress which hugged her curves, she rocked her black stilettos and her makeup was to die for. Her blond bob brazilin was nicely combed and her lips commanded power – red. From the way she was moving about in the kitchen I could see that she was nervous, being quiet I knew so much. I knew my mother more than anyone did and being in her shoes; I too would be nervous. She was seeing the man she had had a minute of pleasure with for the first time after twenty years.

Xeno on the other hand was in a black high waist trouser with a white satin blouse that was nicely tacked in, on the seat opposite to hers was her black jacket. She had black stilettos on and her hair was nicely straightened and her lips ombre with a mixture brown and nu.de.

‘Good morning.’ I said as I sat opposite her ‘You woke up.’ She said not staring at me ‘Xenosah!’ mum yelled

‘What mum? Isn’t it the truth?’ she asked this time rolling her eyes

I just rubbed my fingers together, there was a time when I was bothered about what she said but I guess the more someone gets used to pain they stop feeling it right?’ well that was me

‘I am actually glad I am the one going to stay with dad, trust me I won’t miss you.’ She said getting up

I could see mum fuming from the corner of her eye but said nothing, she had tried her best to make her stop bullying me but it was in vain. At the end of the day, she was both our mother and she couldn’t choose sides.

We heard a car drive into the yard and I knew it was him.