Just After I Said I Do – Episode 4
EPISODE 4
No,
what I am doing is not bad. I am not discussing my marriage with Amaka for her to give me counsel of solution, I know it so very well myself that prayer and holding fast to God’s word is the only solution to the problem in my marriage.
I am discussing my marriage with her because I don’t want her and every lady
reading this to make the same mistake I made….
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I gently used my hands to trace out the position of the socket beside the bed frame so I could switch on the light to check the time. .. Waoh! It’s some minutes to 3:00am in the midnight already, and I have been on this bed all night thinking about my marriage with this man lying and snoring like there’s no tomorrow beside me. Hhhmm, he wasn’t even aware that I switched on the light, I can’t just stop wondering what type of man he is, he can sleep for the whole world.
I felt so tempted to wake him up from sleep as I stared at him, just to ask him the same question I’ve been asking him for years now, I really need to know what exactly I have done wrong that warrant this treatments from him just exactly seven months after I said I do to him… And I was about tapping him at the upper part of his arm, I quickly cautioned myself, hhhmm, omolola, you wouldn’t even dare it, Shey you know what waking him up from sleep could cause abi…
And so I gently reached out for my Bible and knelt down to mutter some words of prayer as that is the only consolation I have left…. I had barely prayed for 20minutes in tears when Raph’s thick angry voice caught my attention…
…” oh my God, what the hell is all this rubbish tonight, if you want to pray and she’d tears at the same time, there are better places you can do that other than this room. Must you always pretend to be a praying wife in order to get my attention?… I left you at home through out the damn whole day doing nothing, you couldn’t say your prayers then abi, must it be in the dead of the night while I’m having a sound sleep!!! ….
I quickly managed to adjust my position to kneel uprightly placing my two hands on the bed and I opened my mouth to mutter few words so gently and softly as I can…
…” I’m so sorry honey, I didn’t mean to disturb your sleep at all”…. And then he
cut in so sharply before I could even finish… “please save me those craps of yours”… He drew the blanket off the bed angrily and walked out of the room as I
watched him helplessly until he was out of sight and I couldn’t help my tears anymore, I rested on the bed and all I could say in tears was.. “God please have mercy on me”.
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Hhhmm.
I have never believed the saying “A wrong marriage is the second place after hell fire” until I found myself in one… My marriage will clock two years in three months time and it’s already looking like I’ve been married to my husband hundreds of years ago,
The affection is no longer there… Respect and intimacy has found it way out of my marriage… Talking about love, romance and nice words between couples?.. No no no, it’s a thing of the past in my marriage. I can’t even remember the last time I sat down with my husband to talk, laugh, play rough and the likes…. Our
weekends together is nothing to write home about…. And our sex life? Hhhmm,
we only do that when his hormones are craving for it, and I can tell you there’s no single pleasure in it. …
Yes
And that’s how terrible my marriage with Raph was, there’s actually nothing I know how to do very well in the sight of my husband…
I spent so many years of my life studying and struggling to be a pharmacist, and I have never worked as one ever since I graduated, not because I do not have a very good certificate, nor because I do not have series of firms which I could work with, but because I got married to the man who’s plan and purpose is not even inline with God’s plan and purpose for my life….
I am 27 years old, but if you see me, you’ll mistake me for a 24year old lady… That’s just to tell you that my look and shape are in perfect order, I have never for once have this notion that I am a married woman and so I should dress shabbily, I
am always trying my best to look smart and attractive, so Raph can not say his drastic change towards me is because of my appearance.
…. Oh, ok
You might be thinking I am not a good cook or something,… Well, I need no other compliment from anybody about the taste and appearance of my food, Raph’s compliments concerning my food in the first six months of our marriage was a mind blowing one. And that is just enough for me to know that I am a good cook, cos if I am not one, he would have mentioned it long before now.
Or
Are you thinking I am bad at house chores?
No no no,
I automatically became a full house wife the very moment I changed from being a miss to a Mrs. I do My husband’s laundry with my very own hands, not because we do not have a washing machine, but because my darling husband does not like his clothes being washed with a machine… Hhhmm… Oh, you see my very clean compound and sparkling furniture neatly arranged at the right place in every part of the house, all thanks to me, myself and I, because I do the cleaning every blessed day. So laziness is totally out of it. I am not the lazy type and so Raph can not even say he’s treating me like this because I turned out to be a lazy wife…
And I just keep asking myself over and over again… WHAT EXACTLY HAVE I DONE WRONG?
JUST AFTER I SAID I DO