The Adventure Of Kúkù Jósẹ́fù – Episode 11

උɦคpt㉫® 11

 

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Author’s POV

 

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I make sure I finished the food and even lick the plate clean without caring about what they are going to eat.

 

 

 

Dem go dey do like say na only dem get parent, no be Pesin born me.

 

 

 

Ah go show them I be mama josefu pikin, ah go show them say na from village I come from…..mtcheeeeew yeye people.

 

 

 

I put back the plate in the kitchen and took a can drink from the fridge and went to chill with them in the parlor.

 

 

 

I sat on the couch and watched the news and I can feel their anger only that they don’t know how to exert it on me.

 

 

 

I pick up the remote and changed the channel and luckily it got a station that they are playing my favorite artist’s song.

 

 

 

‘Billionaire’ by TENI

 

 

Wanna make love on the moon

 

Dancing to my tunes

 

Is it too much, is not too much

 

I wanna be on Forbes list

 

If wishes were horses

 

Is it too much, it’s not too much

 

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Shebi omoba ni mi,

 

Mo tun wo dansakati s’ese

 

Shebi omoba ni mi

 

Omo’ba i ma ki so’jo

 

Omo’ba i ma ki n foya

 

Omo’ba ni mi, eeh yeah

 

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I wanna be a billionaire

 

Billionaire, yeah yeah

 

I wanna be a billionaire

 

Billionaire yeah eeeh eeh!

 

Iyalaya anybody oh, anybody oh yeah

 

(Yeh yeh yeh, yeh yeh)

 

Otedola o lo’ri meji oh, lo’ri meji oh yeah

 

(Yeh yeh yeh, yeh yeh yeh)

 

I wanna be a billionaire, billionaire yeah yeah

 

(Yeh yeh yeh, yeh yeh yeh)

 

I wanna be a billionaire, billionaire yeah yeah

 

(Yeh yeh yeh, yeh yeh yeh)

 

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I wanna wake up in a Lamborghini, aie

 

I wan chop life for Santorini

 

Make money touch the ceiling

 

Oouuuh yeahooooh yeah yeah

 

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Shebi omoba ni mi,

 

mo tun wo dansakati s’ese

 

Shebi omoba ni mi

 

Omo’ba i ma ki so’jo

 

Omo’ba i ma ki n foya

 

Omo’ba ni mi, eeh yeah

 

Iyalaya anybody oh, anybody oh yeah

 

(Yeh yeh yeh, yeh yeh)

 

Otedola o lori meji oh, lori meji oh yeah

 

(Yeh yeh yeh, yeh yeh yeh)

 

I wanna be a billionaire, billionaire yeah yeah

 

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As I was dancing to the song excitedly Vanessa went to the TV and out of anger he removed the plug.

 

 

 

why you comot the plug? ” I asked but she didn’t say anything.

 

 

 

you can never be a billionaire, never, not even in the world or the next, not even a kobonaire” Kate said.

 

 

 

na you talk am no be God ” I said.

 

you will regret what you just did ” Vanessa said.

 

 

 

 

” regret wetin?…..na lie I no go regret anything” I fire back.

 

 

 

na me talk say make you no sabi cook, a girl like you, you no sabi cook, all you sabi do is shakara” I said.

 

 

 

mtcheeeeew ” she hissed and went to the kitchen as her siblings went after her.

 

 

 

abi make I advise you, if you check the store you will garri for there, at least you no go cook that one, just put water and start to they drink” I shouted making from they heard from the kitchen.

 

 

 

I plug back the TV and search the channel but unfortunately they’ve ended the song.

 

 

 

the mention for the boos

 

Dancing to the tunes

 

Is too much yeee, sister too much ehh

 

I wanna be your first thing, you wan see my something.

 

Is it too much yeee, sister too much yee

 

Iyalaiya anybody ooo, anybody ooo

 

 

 

As I was singing I see them coming back with snacks and yoghurt just like I did yesterday.

 

 

 

Now they are tasting exactly what they did to me, they should also see eat snacks today.

 

 

 

Instead of them going to their separate rooms they all entered Vanessa’s room, and I suspected they are planning something cause nothing good can come out of their gathering.

 

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(Evening)

 

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After having the house to myself all day without those children disturbing me.

 

 

I went to the kitchen and do the dishes then went to check on them, I opened Vanessa’s door and found them all asleep.

 

 

 

I smiled victoriously as I saw them cause it remind me of how I also sleep when I can’t find something good to eat.

 

 

 

I heard a car horn which means Mrs Richards is back then I went out to meet her.

 

welcome back ma” I greeted.

 

 

 

how are you Joseph? ” she asked as I helped her with the bag.

 

I’m fine aunty” I replied as we entered.

 

 

 

okay, where are the rest? ” she asked.

 

them dey sleep” I said.

 

really?…..that’s new” she said then settle down.

 

 

 

aunty, shey I should bring water for you?” I asked.

 

 

 

yeah” she replied and i went to get her water.

 

I gave her the water and after she rested a bit she went to freshen up before she could start making dinner.

 

 

 

Hours later Mr Richards also came back and by that time dinner is ready then Mrs Richards sent me to wake the kids up for dinner.

 

 

 

I went to Vanessa’s room and as I entered I found Vanessa awake already.

 

 

 

” what are you doing in my room?” she shouted.

 

 

abegi…..keep kwayet, keep kwayet hope, your papa and mama Don come, so you better come chop better something for your belle, you know say you no kuku chop food for afternoon” I said then went out of the room.

 

 

 

I went back to the dinning to sit with them as we wait for Vanessa and her siblings.

 

After a while they started coming and joined us at the dinning.

 

 

 

Good evening mom, Good evening dad” they greetef their parent and I nodded negatively as they can’t even show a sign of respect to their parent.

 

 

 

how are you dear? ” Mrs Richards said.

 

shey na like that, you go greet your parent, you no fit postate(prostrate)” I said.

 

 

 

will you shut up, don’t you dare meddle in our affairs” Vanessa said angrily.

 

 

 

ah no know say the food pain am like this oooo, now I know the meaning of an hungry man is an animal (a hungry man is an angry man) ” I thought.

 

 

 

Vanessa what’s wrong?……you seem angry” Mrs Richards asked.

 

Mom, this is your fault…..you intended to starve us in this house” Vanessa said.

 

 

 

dear, what’s is she talking about?” Mr Richards asked his wife.

 

 

 

I wanted them to cook in the house so I didn’t leave them any money,i don’t want them going around every eatery eating, I thought Joseph is going to cook” she said looking at me.

 

 

 

yes aunty I cook, I cook food” I said.

 

what did you cook? ” Mr Richards asked.

 

yam and egg” I answered.

 

 

you hear that, he said he cooked so what are you talking about” Mr Richards said looking at his daughter.

 

 

 

Dad, he cooked it and eat it alone” Paulina said and I can see the hurt in her voice.

 

ugh….shiioor, you wan chop before you dey do yanga” I thought.

 

 

 

Joseph, you didn’t give them from the food” Mrs Richards said.

 

 

 

aunty, when I was go cook, I jejely stand up and jejely ask them if them go eat, them no say anything, they do like this mmmmtccheeeeeeeeew” I said.

 

 

 

and me I no kuku want make the food to waste, so I kuku no cook their own join” I added.

 

 

 

he said he asked you but you ignored him, what other choice does he have? ” Mr Richards said.

 

 

 

Dad, is that what you got to say to this?” Vanessa said then turn back to leave.

 

stop right there Vanessa, and sit down” Mr Richards said.

 

 

 

ugh….dey go now if hunger waya you well well, you go know say food dey do miracle things for body” I thought.

 

 

 

your papa dey follow you talk you dey comot for him presence, ahh mama josefu well done

 

ooo…..mama josefu go down beat you tire your ear go comot” I thought.

 

 

 

Now listen all of you, I don’t want any complain from any of you from now on, I want you all to resolve whatever issue you have together, do you understand? ” Mr Richards said.

 

 

 

yes unculu ” I answered while the rest mumbled.

 

Joseph, do you understand? ” he asked.

 

yes sir” I replied.

 

 

 

you are the eldest so you should know what to do” he said.

 

yes unculu” I said.

 

 

 

Now let’s eat” he said and we ate the food in silence.

 

 

 

After eating we all sitted in the parlor and watch a television show together, since today is Friday we stay out late before we go back to our room.

 

 

 

As I got back to my room I think about how fun today is for me, if they don’t want to settle things with me then it’s okay by me, I will also show them I don’t give up easily.

 

 

 

If they try me again I will do them shege.

 

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Author’s POV

 

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Vanessa and her siblings all gather back into her room to discuss about what their father said.

 

 

 

do you think we should be friends with him? ” Paulina asked.

 

 

 

oh hell not, he can’t get away with what he did, we will surely get back at him” Vanessa said.

 

 

 

what if what happened today happen again” Katie said.

 

then we will know what to do” Vanessa said.

 

 

 

Mr and Mrs Richards are in their room also talking about the children.

 

 

 

do you think out kids will settle things with Joseph?” Mr Richards asked.

 

I doubt that…..i know my kids, they can be stubborn ” Mrs Richards said.

 

 

 

yeah, and I think Joseph is as stubborn as they are” Mr Richards said.

 

yeah, which makes him the only person that can handle them” Mrs Richards said.

 

 

 

let’s do something, let’s not meddle with them let’s just see as things go with them, but if they report anything try to resolve it but don’t judge anyone” Mr Richards said.

 

 

 

of course, I know the kind of person they are which is why I don’t really put more concern on it” Mrs Richards said.

 

 

 

I think they will get along eventually ” Mr Richards said.

 

yeah they will, but not now” Mrs Richards said.

 

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(Next Day)

 

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Joseph’s POV

 

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I woke up as usual, yawning like a hungry lion then dash into the bathroom.

 

 

 

I got dressed then went to the parlor and met Mr Richards and Mrs Richards in the parlor watching News.

 

 

 

good mawring sir, good mawring ma” I said prostrating before them.

 

morning Joseph” Mr Richards said.

 

 

 

morning, how was your night?” Mrs Richards asked.

 

e good, e good, I sleep well well” I said smiling.

 

 

Joseph, you need to work on your English, now that you’re in Lagos your English should be improving” Mr Richards said.

 

 

 

I dey try unculu, I kuku dey try” I said.

 

it’s uncle not unculu or whatever you called it” he said.

 

 

 

okay, un..cu” I said.

 

uncle” he corrected.

 

uncle” I said.

 

 

 

“I’ve spoken to the principal of my children’s school about you and he said you should come over” he said then continue.

 

 

 

So on Monday when the school resumes you will be resuming with them as well” he concluded.

 

 

 

thank you, uncle” I said smiling.

 

do you think the principal will accept especially when it’s third term already” Mrs Richards said.

 

 

 

yeah, I’ve explained everything to him” he said.

 

since he stopped in jss3, he will continue from there right?” Mrs Richards asked.

 

 

 

yeaeeh, but I’m not sure if he can still meet up cause he said he stopped schooling for a very long time, so I don’t know if the knowledge is still there” Mr Richards said.

 

 

 

Yes Uncle, I dey go lesson when I dey for village” I said.

 

really? ” Mrs Richards asked.

 

 

 

Yes Aunty, my mama dey give me #50 naira everyday to go one lesson wey dey our village ” I said.

 

 

 

 

” woww that’s good, it shouldn’t be that hard anymore” Mr Richards exclaimed.

 

 

 

As we are discussing the kids came down to the parlor and greeted their parent only by hugging them.

 

 

 

ha ha, which kain crazy be this?, una no fit lie down for ground and greet una parent, ahh, mama josefu weldone” I thought.

 

 

 

They sat beside their parent and they stare at me and scoffed mockingly.

 

 

 

what are you discussing? ” Vanessa asked.

 

yeah, Joseph will be resuming school with you guys on Monday” Mr Richards said.

 

 

 

whaaaaat” they shouted.

 

dad why?……can’t you just enrolled him in different school” Vanessa said.

 

 

 

why should I do that when the rest of you are going to the same school” Mr Richards said.

 

 

 

ughh dad you are unbelievable ” Vanessa said.

 

calm down Vanessa, what else do you expect us to do” Mrs Richards said.

 

 

 

dad which class is he gonna be?” Paul asked.

 

 

 

since he stopped his education in jss3, so he’s going to start from there” Mr Richards said.

 

 

 

Jss3?” both Paul and Paulina said in shock while Vanessa and Katie laughed out loud.

 

dad, isn’t he too old for that class? ” Paul asked.

 

 

 

it’s doesn’t matter, he’s still young and also be able to take the class” Mr Richards said.

 

 

aaahhh, this is so gonna be fun” Vanessa said glaring at me scornfully and I know something is not right.

 

 

 

With this girl looking at me in this manner I’m very sure no good thoughts is running inside her tiny little head so I better watch out.

 

 

 

After we had our breakfast and rested for an hours Mr Richards took us out to have fun.

 

 

 

We went go different places like the Arcade where we played different games then to the museum where i see my first live giraffe and some other animals that i only see on TV.

 

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(Evening)

 

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After all of our adventure we go back home in the evening and went to freshen up.

 

 

 

We all meet back up in the parlour make review of our outing.

 

Alright guys, what should we have for dinner?” Mrs Richards asked.

 

 

 

Make we eat Iyan(pounded yam)” i suggested.

 

You mean poundo yam?” Mrs Richards said and i nodded affirmative.

 

 

 

We don’t have the flour anymore, but i will buy it when i go to the market” Mrs Richards said.

 

 

 

Haha which flour again, i see yam inside the store na, and the wetin dem dey call this thing wey dem dey use to pound am” i said trying to remember it name.

 

 

 

You mean mortal and pestle?” Mr Richard said.

 

Yes uncle, na that one” i said.

 

 

And who’s going to pound it, I don’t have the strenght to do that, we just have it in the store we don’t use it” Mrs Richards said and i smiled .

 

 

 

No worry aunty, i will do am” i said.

 

Hell no, I’m not eating anything this village boy cooks, I’d rather eat snacks” Vanessa said.

 

 

 

Well we are eating it, besides it’s been a while since I have eat it” Mr Richards said.

 

Daddd, so what are we going to eat?” Katie asked.

 

 

 

I advised you eat as well or you can eat snacks just as you said” Mr Richards said and they frowned.

 

 

 

Let’s get to work then” Mrs Richards said and we went to the kitchen together.

 

As I was peeling the yam she told me that it’s enough and I disagreed immediately.

 

 

 

But we can’t finish this much” she said.

 

Don’t worry aunty ,I will help you finish am” I said then I continue peeling it.

 

 

 

” You people kanno come and make me dey hungry for night” I said.

 

 

 

Some minutes later, the yam is well cooked and I started pounding it and turning it as well, from time to time Mr Richards will come to check on us but the kids never showed.

 

 

 

After I’m done with it, I cut it in different portion which make is in excess and took everything to the dining, Mr Richards joined us but Vanessa and the rest refused.

 

 

 

Mr Richards told them to over right now and they came and sat down.

 

 

 

” I don’t know why he dey force them, if hunger beat their yansh, they go wat” I thought.

 

 

 

 

We started eating and after a while I ate my portion, i pick another portion and continue eating.

 

 

 

I looked at the others and see them enjoying the food, Mr Richards also finished his own and pick another one.

 

 

 

Mrs Richards has almost done with her own, even Vanessa and the rest don’t seems to complain but instead enjoyed it.

 

 

 

” See this people ooo …..chai…I don get una well well” I thought.

 

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After the dinner, I help Mrs Richards clear the dishes to the kitchen, Mr and Mrs Richards couldn’t stop complimenting about the food.

 

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Even I enjoyed it and I’m very sure those spoilt brat also did cause Paul and Paulina finished two wraps but they didn’t say anything.

 

 

 

Thank God that I didn’t listen to Mrs Richards if not I wouldn’t have belle full like thus.

 

 

 

We all went back to our room and I think of how things is going to be for me when I start schooling.

 

 

 

Aaahh….this will be so embarrassing for me to the tallest and oldest of them all in class.

 

Whatever will be will be let’s just see how it’s going to be.

 

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TBC

 

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