Solitude – Episode 4

SOLITUDE

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I get to the said location in not more than an hour, by this time I have stopped crying but my insides still hurt like crazy. After paying the driver I get out of the vehicle and stand outside with a deep sigh, for some reason all this feels like one crazy nightmare. How was it even possible that someone I know and love and is fond of can just die? Just like that with no explanation or goodbye

Yes death is something that we all can’t run away from but I mean, isn’t there another way out? A proper goodbye maybe?

‘Nella?’

I turn to find Chanda

‘My condolences.’ I offer looking at her blood shot eyes

‘Thank you.’ She responds

‘What are you doing here?’

‘I got a call from someone asking me to come here.’

The sorrow on her face disappears in an instant.

‘You are the person we were waiting for?’ she asks

I sense the anger in her voice, we have never been the best of friends. In fact she has told me more than once to my face that she hates how I had taken over her place in her mother’s life, which of course has never been true.

I don’t respond.

I watch as she walks away angrily, her stilettos making a clicking sound as she steps on the beautiful pavement.

We walk into the building and she leads us into a huge boardroom.

Chibesa is sitting on one end, Chanda sits next to him and I take a seat just far away from them as possible.

A tall tanned man walks in, he walks in commanding a certain grace about him.

His features are strong, even in my grief I still recognize his divine appearance.

‘Good morning, my condolences once again.’ He begins

None of us respond

‘For the sake of Ms. Mpanda I will reintroduce myself.’ He says

‘My names are Cochrane August, I was Mrs. Chanda’s lawyer for the past two years. She reached out to me then and said we needed to start working on her will as soon as possible.’

‘Sorry for cutting you off but what is she doing here?’ Chibesa who has never liked me as well asks

August ignores him.

‘As I was saying, I only met Mrs. Chanda once. She wrote this will once never editing it and it has been like that for two years.’

‘What happened to Mr. Mbewe?’ I ask

‘He is still the family Lawyer but for this only, I was put in charge.’ August responds

‘Just get it done with already, I have a funeral to get back to.’ Chanda says

Again, August doesn’t say a word but instead removes some papers from his case which he had earlier set on the table.

Handing one to each of us.

‘Those are copies of the original will which is in the hands of the judge right now.’

‘Are you kidding me?’ Chibesa exclaims

‘This is bullshit.’ Chanda says on her feet

I have not bothered to go through it but with the way they are behaving I decide I better do.

‘I, Chileshe Chanda a resident of plot 1029 Ibex Hill, Lusaka, hereby make this Will and revoke all prior Wills and Codicils.’ It began

‘I was born on June 22nd 1968 in Samfya. I am not currently married but I was previously married to Edward Chanda and the marriage ended by Death. I have three living children; Chanda Chanda, Musonda Chibesa and MpandaNella.’

I paused not believing it, like how in God’s name could she include me as one of her children it was understandable for Chibesa because she had raised him.

I continue to read.

‘I give my property to the following persons: the two farms in chilanga to Chibesa and the house in meanhood. The farm in shimabala, the flats in Northmead and chalala to Chanda. The Firm Chanda and Associates to Nella. The rest can be shared amongst the three as they desire.’

‘I appoint Mr. Cochrane August as Executor of my Will, he shall have all powers granted by applicable laws of my state to carry out all provisions of this Will, may use provisions and procedures for the simplified handling of estates, I, Chileshe Chanda, hereby sign this Will at Chota and Associates on this 29th day of November, 2017.’

‘This is a joke, right?’ I manage to ask as I continue to stare at the paper bewildered

August doesn’t respond

‘My mother would never do something as foolish as this, she was a wise woman.’ Chanda accuses anger all over her

‘You did this didn’t you?’ Chibesa asks charging at me

I look at him, then Chanda and notice she has bought into his stunt.

‘I never wanted more than I deserved, everything she ever gave me I worked for.’ I say getting up as tears continue to roll down my eyes

‘This was a mistake.’ I say taking a look at August before I walk out

I want to be strong, God knows I want that very much, to hold myself together but I can’t. It is enough for a day, I just want to go home and drown in my sorrows.

When I get home, I lock my house and switch off my phone, and then sitting on the floor I let out an anguish cry. The pain is unbearable, I can feel every wall I have built crumbling down. My insides are breaking to tiny pieces that I know will never be put together. I remember the first time she had laid eyes on me at that orphanage, how she took me in as her own never judging or condemning. When the world had given up on me in a foster home she had come to my aid.

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I cry, so bad my voice is becoming inaudible. The cold floor sends a cold sensation through me but that is nothing compared to the void that I am feeling in this moment. Like how am I going to pick up the pieces? How will I stand up again and be the confident girl she had once believed in.

With all these thoughts I fall into a deep slumber hoping that I will wake up and it will all just be a bad dream.