Oh! This My Husband – Episode 5

Part 5

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© Femi Oluyamoju

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HOSPITALLY PACKED

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I must have slept from morning till evening because I was woken up by my monster husband, as soon as I opened my eyes, I saw the skinny thing of a girl first and then my husband by her side.

He was visibly angry, I had slept with the dirty clothes and muddy waters on the couch in the sitting room, I can see pockets of dirt that followed every step into the house. He was raking and vibrating like a machine that had lost control.

He was shouting…..

Pig, bloody pig, that is who you are, your witches powers pushed you into the gutters because that is where you belong, barren witch, useless wife.

And by the way, you told me you were packing out and I will finally be free from breathing in the poisonous air polluted by your obnoxious manifestation of paramount lunatism….

And many more things were said by him, but rather than listen to him, I was having a very bad head ache, I was losing consciousness again. That fall into the drainage must have loosened some key nuts in my head. I knew I was going to faint.

Funny enough, in my quarter to faint state, I noted that my husband is in level 3.5 of his anger

Let me explain. Level one, He ignores me and answers with short replies. Level two

He abuses me based on what has happened and my inability to give birth.

Level three.

He call me names like evil magician, witch or herbalist.

Level four

Here come the English grammars. Mountain moving English constructions.

Today he is already calling me a witch – definitely level 3.

obnoxious manifestation of paramount lunatism, whatever that means is a level 4 something.

Just before I fainted, I noticed that the skinny thing was smiling, that smile is exactly the smile I saw earlier on in my nightmare that day, this pissed me off…… I

wanted to stand up and give her a brain resetting slap that will ensure that no body will be able to smile again in her generation.

As I rose, I discovered the floor was getting closer….

I slumped and fainted.

I woke up in the hospital the next morning, I was afraid I will see their ugly faces again but thank God for little mercies. I was alone.

Oddly, I noticed my purse was by my side. I couldn’t see anyone in my room. I was placed in a private ward.

I noticed more items in the room, this made me sit up,

how dare he, this man is callous and a beast, he is no more a monster, he is now the chief of monsters.

How did I end up marrying a devil, where did I go wrong, why am I getting disgrace from every corner…..

God, why didn’t you just make me blind, answer Pastors’ prayers na. if I was blind, I wouldn’t see the gory sight.

Right in the room with me were my four big traveling bags that I had packed on Saturday morning to leave the house before going to see my Pastor.

This wicked man didn’t only bring me to the hospital, he also brought my load. What kind of man pack his sick wife with her loads to the hospital?

OH THIS MY HUSBAND!

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