Mr Irresistible – Episode 9
✓✓Episode 9
**The next morning**
Me: who is that, that want to bring down my expensive door with knocks?
Adamu; sir, is me Adamu.
Me: the door is not locked, come in.
He comes in smiling….
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Me: can you stop showing me your brown teeth and tell me the reason, you are here this early?
He entered the room smiling like those he
goats that have just finished eaten fresh.
Adamu; there are many girls outside.
Me; is that why you are smiling like you won lottery, see warn yourself ohhh… this is not Chidimma. I will cut off your Hausa carrot. Oya vamoose!
One thing I love about Adamu is his ability
to speak correct English mixed with thick
Hausa accent, that guy voice will just make
You smile even if your day has nothing to smile
about, both of us are glued for life. I raise
my d**k up and wage it with my boxer band
I’d not like it to misbehave during the interview.
I went outside to meet 10 beautiful clean
girls with dangerous asses and biggacious
and sweetacious boobs, ahhh… I said it
my enemies and Village People have returned
from holiday with full force to destroy
my life.
Is not model audition for goodness
sake na housegirl job, Nigeria and no job.
Me: good morning, girls.
Girls: good morning, sir.
Me: you are all welcome, make yourself comfortable, you will be employed and also won’t be employed, the interview will commenced shortly, good luck.
I need to go and check what Adamu pasted
outside, am not seeing any ugly girl here oohh..
How will I survive with those sweet girls
Inside without s*x. Staring at the paper
I asked Adamu to paste, someone have
just sellotaped the ugly from it, this sellotape
have just taken my d**k peace.
I went
inside and proceed with the interview.
thank my master plan, I was interviewing
with my mouth cause my head is picturing
how I will bleep them when I employ
two girls to be my housegirl, my d**k was just
getting hard for nothing.
if not that we are outside I’d have banged one of the daughters of Eve, I finished 10bottles of water cause I was on heat, I must commend Nkiru and
Ejiro, both of them did well but with their
numbers with me, I don’t think I will employ
any of them, I will just go to church to ask
pastor to give me one of the prayer warrior
and devoted sister that will be my housegirl, Sambisa call came in interrupting my thought.
Me: Hello idiot
Sam: oga coma.
Me: Sambisa, the f****r in the forest.
Sam: hmm.. hmm. . Your new hot chick is starting work tomorrow, so when are you starting?
Me: who be my new hot chick? I never see housegirl, if I never employ one, I no go near office.
Sam: your new sextary, if you like dey f**k this one upadan, I trust Chibaby na 6ft sentence she go give you.
Save
me Oh Lord from the daughters of Eve
and I’ll become ardent christain, I no even
ask Sambisa make em arrange two hot
holy holy sisters from em church.
Me: Sambisa, commot for my line *hissed*
Call cut… I called back
Me: hello, Sambisa
Sam: aahhh.. oga coma, why you dey call again, or you lost small memo due to coma?
Me: I no get time for your wahala, Sam. Which church you dey go?
Sambisa: L.W.F.S. ministry.
Me: thank God.
Sam: For?
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Me: you manage dey go church.
Sam: hmm…never thank am first oohh….
Me: na you sabi, you fit arrange two holy holy sisters from ona church to run my house package, I wan repent.
Sam: I fit arrange two sister M for you.
Me: I no want people where dey bear Mary as name.
Sam: who tell you say sister M na Mary.
Me: so na Mirabel?
Sam: no.
Me: Miracle?
Sam: no
Me: oboy, na who na?
Sam: two sister Monkey.. *line death*
Your father
Sam, the only option left is to call pastor
Jeremiah, hope he isn’t prophet of doom.
we have beautiful sisters and semi ugly
holy holy sisters, I dialed his number.
Me: Good Morning, pastor
Pastor: aahhh… brother Victor, you didn’t attend this past service, why?
Me: am just coming back from the hospital, have been sick.
Pastor: brother say you will never fall into the hands of sickness.
Me: I will never fall in the hands of sickness
Pastor: good, am coming to your house tomorrow.
Me: eehhnn… sir, I need a good sister that will help to keep my house clean, and I will pay for her services.
Pastor: no problem, am coming with one tomorrow.
Me: thank you, sir.
Pastor: you are welcome *called off*
I trust pastor Jeremiah, hope am not going to
be seeing monkey as my house girl in my
dreams to night.
what is the full meaning
of L.W.F.S ministry? Hmm.. Sam. Sam.
.
.
.
T.B.C
Mr irresistible
