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“Hey Zoe.” I said, crouching down to her level.
“Mum, please answer the question.” She says and I looked at her nervously and try to reach out to her with my hands but my baby moved back and I gasp in shock at her.
“Zoe, don’t move away from me.” I say huskily.
“Mum please answer the question, is he my father, is he?.” She asked again and I gulped down in fear, I can’t tell her the truth, I can’t lose my daughter to Jeremy.
“No of course not, his not your father.” I say smiling at her and tried to reach out to her once more but she only stepped back.
“Mum, he took me to the hospital, and a doctor took some of my blood, he said he was going to run a test on me and then he’ll be able to tell from the test if sir Jeremy is my father, mum the doctor said I was his daughter, mum why don’t you want me to have a father?.”
“Oh no honey, I’m not hiding you away from your Father, this man here isn’t your father, his lying, the doctor is lying, they are all lying to you.” I yelled out as tears runs down my face.
“No you’re lying to me mum and I hate you for that, I hate you mum!!.” Zoe yells at me before running off.
I felt a pang on my chest as I watched my baby run off. The only family I have left just told me she hates me and it’s all because of one man, JEREMY.
“How dare you, how dare you walk in to my life and try to take my own daughter away from me, who the hell do you think you are, huh, who do you think you’re.” I yell hysterical, raining punches on his manly chest.
“Nadine calm down.” Jeremy shouts, holding unto both my hands, I tried to wriggle my hands out of his hold but it was useless, so I stopped and glared holes at him instead.
“I know I fu.cked up Nadine, hell I more than fu.cked up but zoe is my daughter, at least give me a chance to take part in her life, please don’t deny me of that right, Nadine.” He pleads, staring deep into my eyes with those beautiful eyes of his and I almost got lost in it, keyword: almost.
“You had fu.cking lost that right the minute you broke my heart, you lost it the minute you cheated on me, you lost it the minute you left me, Jeremy, you have no right over my daughter, now please leave, get out of my house and never come back.” I said, my head raised high up but the inside of me was crumbling but I wouldn’t give him the satisfaction of seeing what he did to me years ago still had an effect on me.
Jeremy stares at me for a while before walking towards the door, his hands reached the doorknob but he didn’t turn it instead he stares at me intently and then says, “I know you’re hurt, Nadine but don’t let you feelings cloud your sense of judgement, because right now you’re being really selfish keeping Zoe away from her own father, you should really think of your daughter happiness before asking me to stay away.” He says and then leaves.
I found myself falling to the floor, as those words Jeremy said replay in my head over and over again, I’m I being selfish?? I’m I doing the wrong thing by letting Jeremy stay away from my daughter??. I sigh heavily and wipe the tears away from my face before standing up, I climb the staircase deep in thought thinking of my next move, as I reached my daughter room, I heard faint cries from her room and my heart shatters into million pieces knowing I’m the cause of her cries.
I open the door slowly and then walked into her room, she raised her head up on seeing me. “Mum!!.” She utters and climbs down from the bed and runs into my outstretched hands.
“Hey baby, momma is really sorry for making you cry.” I said, kissing the top of her head.
“I’m sorry too mum, I didn’t mean it when I said I hated you, I can never have you mum, you’re the best mom in the whole wide world.” She says opening her hands wide to demonstrate how wide she means.
“And you’re the best daughter in the whole wide world, now who’s ready to eat and the have her bath.” I asked smiling widely at her.
“Me! Me! Me!.” She yells jumping up and down, and my smile grew wider as I take her up In my arms.
I stare at my sleeping daughter face, with so much love and adoration, Jeremy words still fresh in mind.
*I know you’re hurt Nadine but don’t let your feelings cloud your sense of judgement*
Is that what I’m doing right now, am I letting my anger towards Jeremy cloud my sense of judgement, I’m I doing the right thing by letting Jeremy stay away from his daughter?.
*Bescause right now you’re being really selfish keeping Zoe from her own father*
Are my decision based on selfish interest, are they the best for Zoe?.
*You should really think of your own daughters happiness before asking me to stay away*
Would Zoe be more happy if she had a father, she had always asked me about her father, and now that she knows she has one, wouldn’t it be selfish of me to still deny her the right of a father in her life.
What if she ends up hating me, wouldn’t that be more worst than sharing her with Jeremy. They say in life if you love someone then you should always put their happiness first, I’ll put my daughter happiness first, even I have to see Jeremy every blessed day as long as she’s happy then I’m happy.
With a final stare at my daughter I walked out of her room and then back to the sitting room, I pick up my phone and dial Jeremy’s number.
“Hello.” His gruffy voice comes through the speaker.