Adebimpe: The Facebook Girl – Episode 81

On thursday morning, I left home for work as usual. I got to my desk in the morning and resumed work. My heart was filled with worries, fear and anxiety as I became uncomfortable on my seat. For some moments, I would just stare into the ceiling and soliloquies with account packages on the table unattended to, at a point, I was shedding tears and I don’t know it, the fear of “is this how I will loose betty?” filled my heart and I couldn’t concentrate on anything. My temperature was raised immediately . At around 10am, I got an envelope on the notification of my system. It was a message on my microsoft outlook, I opened it and discovered that it was a message from funmilayo which says “onihaxy, see me in my office immediately”. I got scared and I was so worried. From the history of funmilayo that I was told about, I heard that she is very dangerous and bossy, she is rude, arrogant and deadly, she doesn’t send for staffs anyhow and every of her subordinates feared her as she can fire anybody, I also heard that whenever she sent such mail, its either she wanted to fire someone or she wanted to serve someone a query. Immediately, I pinged my team-lead on bbm to tell him that funmilayo sent for me, my teamlead replied with a “surprise” smiley and he told me to summon courage and answer her.

I suspended what I was doing, stood up from my seat and went to her door, I knocked and she told me to come in and I entered.

ME: good morning ma.

FUNMI: ***raised eyebrow*** ma?, minus 5k from your salary this month.

ME: **scared*** I’m sorry, good morning funmi

FUNMI: better, how are you?

ME: **still scared and worried*** i am fine

FUNMI: you can have your seat

ME: ***pulled the visitors chair and sat down*** thank you

FUNMI: ***held her pen with one hand, hitting it against the other hand with her glasses adjusted and she was staring straight into my eyes**** onihaxy!!!!!!!

ME: ****scared with my heart beating heavily****** Ma!!!

FUNMI: ***pulled closer to her desk*** I have been going round, observing all the new project staffs and also going through their targets. I found out you have been doing well and also exceeding targets, keep it up

ME: thank you

FUNMI: however, I have been observing you through the glass since morning, I noticed you are behaving unusually funny today. What happened?

ME: nothing ma.

FUNMI: ***smiled*** your girl dumped you?

ME: no

FUNMI: anyways, I know you are suffering from an emotional trauma. That is why I called you.

ME: **silent***

FuNMI: look here onihaxy, everyone has one or two issues battling with them, maybe your girl dumped you, your wife gave birth or whatever it may be, the moment you get to the bank entrance, you just have to drop every emotions at the gate, enter the compound and concentrate at work and after work, you can pick your problems from the gate and return home with them.

ME: yes ma

FUNMI: here in this bank, it is either 100% or zero, we don’t tolerate errors, there is no way you won’t make errors when you combine your emotional problem with the work on your desk, you can never concentrate. I’m telling you this because I can see you have been working hard, if any error is detected in your work, you are gone, is that clear?

ME: yes ma.

FUNMI: ok, you can go back to your desk.

ME: ok ma.

I left funmi’s table and returned to my desk. It was difficult for me to concentrate on my work so I had to put on my earphones and play music from my phone. At break time. I stepped out to meet my other team mates at their office to catch fun with them in order to overcome my worries. I was surprised that the news had went round that funmi sent me a mail to come to her office.

“What happened onihaxy?”

“Wetin you do funmi?”

“Na wetin she tell you?”

“She don sack you?”

People began to ask me several questions and I told them that she sent for me to come and eat lunch with her in her office, I became a celebrity instantly as it turned to a topic of discussion till the end of the day.

I got home after work that night. I heard my shower and had a chat with bimpe and betty at the same time. I begged betty to tell me about the suspense but she still insisted that I have to wait till she is back from abuja. I was also chatting with bimpe till I excused myself to eat dinner.

After the dinner, I was preparing for friday’s work when my phone began to ring. I checked the screen and it was bimpe.

ME: hello bimpe,

BIMPE: hi onihaxy, how is work today?

ME: fine, and yours?

BIMPE: good

ME: ok

BIMPE: I will be off duty this weekend, can you come around please?, I want to show you something and also give you plans on how to get your girl back to you.

ME: ****silent***

BIMPE: onihaxy, you aren’t talking, hello!!!!

ME: I’m just scared, are you sure you aren’t setting me up or planning anything funny?

BiMPE: anything funny like raping you abi?

ME: ****laughed***

BIMPE: ***laughed tooo****

ME: ok, let me tell betty about it

BIMPE: haba onihaxy, why will you do that now?, just let her travel while we make our own plans. You will pay me for my services oooo.

ME: ok, I hear.

BIMPE: alright, I will be expecting you in lekki on saturday.

ME: ok. ****chai onihaxy!!!!!!, can bimpe be friendly or dangerous this time?*******